http://starkravingcalm.com a mad writer's blogoratory Tue, 26 Aug 2008 21:27:13 +0000 http://backend.userland.com/rss092 en So about that mystery assignment I spoke of last time: I'm auditioning for a writer's slot at [TVgasm](http://tvgasm.com). (The name is silly, but the recaps are hilarious.) The audition process is basically a head-to-head competition against the other submitters. The powers that be must have liked me, ... http://starkravingcalm.com/archives/i-need-your-vote From the lack of recent posts, you might conclude that I'm not doing much writing lately. You'd be wrong. It's OK, we all make mistakes. I forgive you. So I'm not cranking out *thousands of words* a day (I'm lucky if I get an hour a day to ... http://starkravingcalm.com/archives/state-of-the-src I've decided to reboot an old venture. A couple of years ago, I started a site called [Copyhacker](http://copyhacker.com) with the intent of exposing awful web copy. (I [posted it here](http://starkravingcalm.com/archives/a-hacking-we-will-go) as well, and I still have the badge in my sidebar.) It didn't go far -- perhaps because I emailed ... http://starkravingcalm.com/archives/bad-copy-just-got-pwned (from [Daily 5](http://www.cmmayo.com/d5mwearchives.july.html)) How a character handles a given object can be immensely revealing. Briefly describe, as specifically as you can, how the following characters would handle a pencil: - a harried middle aged librarian named Greta Hurleyburton >Wears one over each ear and is constantly sharpening them with old-school crank sharpener mounted ... http://starkravingcalm.com/archives/pencils *Prompt: Write something that incorporates a squid, a lampshade and the smell of burning tortillas.* Another tantrum, sure enough. This one’s a doozy. The house shakes with the screaming. I pause in my dinner prep, trying to muster the intestinal fortitude necessary to ignore the assault on my ... http://starkravingcalm.com/archives/toddler-smash By now you've heard that Copyblogger's [Twitter Writing Contest](http://www.copyblogger.com/twitter-writing-contest-winners/) is over, if you were following it. Of the dozens of prizes handed out, the best prize was unexpected: the winners scored a mention in the [LA Times](http://www.latimes.com/technology/la-fi-twitlit31-2008may31,1,1367116.story). Talk about instant exposure. Instead of wasting time wondering how ... http://starkravingcalm.com/archives/twitter-writing-contest-deconstructing-the-winners At last, an opportunity to redeem all the literary mojo I've spent on Twitter! Copyblogger is running a [Twitter writing contest](http://www.copyblogger.com/twitter-writing-contest). Here's [my entry](http://twitter.com/gravelpup/statuses/815664687): > He hunched by the bar phone, randomly dialing lipstick numbers from the dingy mirror nearby. On his last quarter, a familiar voice: "Ernie?" http://starkravingcalm.com/archives/use-your-twitter-powers-for-good “Joan here. A meteor just landed in my yard.” “A what?” “You know, one of those rocks from space. It’s right out in my front yard. I’m lucky it missed my mailbox.” “Joan, aren’t those things, like, dangerous? And hot and stuff?” “Well, I heard this ripping noise, there was a ... http://starkravingcalm.com/archives/freds-phone-call Against the background hum and hiss of the children, the bird and monkey calls were bright clear notes tapped out on a piano. http://starkravingcalm.com/archives/i-went-to-the-zoo-today-and-all-i-got-was-this-lousy-sentence-2 Something I heard [Jared Axelrod](http://jaredaxelrod.com/main/) talk about in an [I Should Be Writing interview](http://murverse.com/2008/04/08/isbw-special-30-jared-axelrod-interview/): publish *some* kind of daily project. I do the Daily 5 thing, and some free writing, and every once in awhile if *everything else* is off my plate I pull out a short story ... http://starkravingcalm.com/archives/just-publish-something-already